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I had Parkinson’s
disease.
I was diagnosed in June
2001.The disease struck the left side of my body, causing very
serious difficulties for me, given that I was left-handed. After
three years, the initial stage of the illness that was slowly
progressive, the symptoms began to get worse: an increase in
tremors, rigidity, pain, sleeplessness.
Starting on April 2,
2005, I began to worsen from week to week, I was wasting away,
day by day. I was no longer able to write (being left-handed,
as I said), or, if I tried to, what I wrote was barely legible.
I was no longer able to drive a car, except for very short
distances, because my left leg sometimes got blocked, even for
long periods and rigidity made driving difficult. In addition,
to do my work in the hospital, I always needed more time. I was
totally exhausted.
After the diagnosis it
was difficult for me to follow John Paul II on television.
However, I felt very close to him in prayer and I knew that he
could understand what I was living through. I admired his
strength and courage and they stimulated me to not give up and
to love this suffering. Only love would give meaning to all of
this. It was a daily struggle but my only wish was to live it in
faith and to adhere with love to the Father’s will.
It was Easter 2005 and I
wanted to see our Holy Father in television because I knew, deep
within me, that it would be the last time I would have been able
to do so. All morning long I prepared myself for that
“encounter” (he reminded me of what I would be in three years).
It was hard for me, being so young. However, an unexpected
occurrence in work did not allow me to see him.
The evening of April 2,
2005 the entire community had gathered to participate in the
prayer vigil in St. Peter’s Square, live on French television
from the diocese of Paris (KTO). At the announcement of John
Paul’s death, my entire world fell apart, I had lost the only
friend who could understand me and give me strength to go
forward. In those days I felt a great emptiness, but I also had
the certainty of his living presence.
On May 13, feast of Our
Lady of Fatima, Pope Benedict XVI officially announced the
special dispensation for the start of the cause of beatification
and canonization of servant of God John Paul II. Starting on May
14, my fellow sisters from all the French and African
communities started asking John Paul II to intercede for my
healing. They prayed incessantly, tirelessly, right up to the
news of my healing.
I was on vacation at the
time. On May 26. having ended a period of rest, I returned to
the community, totally exhausted because of my disease. “If you
believe, you will see the Glory of God,” this was the verse from
the Gospel of St. John that, since May 14, had kept me company.
But on June 1, I could not take it any longer! I had to struggle
just to stay on my feet and walk. On June 2, in the afternoon,
I went to find my superior to ask her to release me from my
work. She asked me to try and resist a while longer, until the
return from Lourdes in August and added: “John Paul II has not
yet said his final word.” He was surely present at that
encounter that took place in such peace and serenity. Then, my
superior held out a pen and asked me to write “John Paul II.” It
was 5 p.m.
With difficulty I wrote
“John Paul II.” As I looked at the illegible writing, I remained
some time in silence. And the day passed as it usually did.
At 9 p.m., after evening
prayer, I left my office to go to my room. I felt the need to
take a pen and write, as if someone had ordered me, “Take your
pen and write.” It was 9:30/9:45 p.m.
And my handwriting was
perfectly legible! Astonishing! I laid on my bed, amazed.
Exactly two months has
passed since John Paul II returned to the House of the Father.
I awoke at 4:30, amazed at having been able to sleep. I suddenly
got out of bed: my body was no longer painful, there was no
rigidity and inside, I was no longer the same. Then, an inner
call and a strong desire to go and pray before the Blessed
Sacrament. I went into the oratory and stayed in adoration. I
felt a profound sense of peace and well-being; an experience
that was too great, a mystery, difficult to explain with words.
Still in front of the
Blessed Sacrament, I mediated on the Mysteries of Light composed
by John Paul II. At 6 in the morning I left to join my fellow
sisters in chapel for a moment of prayer followed by Eucharistic
celebration. I had to walk about 50 meters and at that moment I
became aware that, as I was walking, my left arm was swinging by
my side, it was no longer immobile. I also felt a lightness and
a physical agility that I had not experienced for quite some
time. During the Eucharistic celebration, I was filled with joy
and peace. It was June 3, feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus.
As we left Mass, I was sure that I was healed. My hand no longer
trembled. I went again to write and at noon I suddenly stopped
taking my medicine.
On June 7th,
as scheduled, I went to see the neurologist who had been caring
for me for four years. He too was very surprised as he noted the
sudden disappearance of all the symptoms of the disease,
notwithstanding the interruption of treatment for five days
prior to the visit. A day later, our superior general asked all
of our communities to give thanks. Every community then began a
novena to John Paul II.
It has now been 10
months since any kind of treatment has been given. I have
resumed working normally, I have no difficulty in writing and I
even drive the car for long distances. I feel as if I have been
reborn: It is a new life because it is not like before.
Today I can say that the
friend who left our earth is now closer to my heart. He made
grow within me the desire for adoration of the Blessed Sacrament
and love for the Eucharist, that have a priority place in my
daily life.
What the Lord has
allowed me to live through the intercession of John Paul II is a
great mystery, difficult to explain in words……but nothing is
impossible for God.
And it is indeed true:
“If you believe, you will see the glory of God.”
A French Sister
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